(12-20-2019, 01:33 PM)Magickian Wrote: So I really wish people would stop using either word, because they are misused, overused, and typically used by those that seem to have those very qualities themselves.
I still think the disconnect here is:
1) You are wanting to use "narcissism" and "gaslighting" in a strict DSM kind of "diagnostic" sense---if you don't meet all the criteria then don't use the term. This has a place I suppose.
2) I am wanting (as the leading experts are starting to see) to use the terms "narcissism" and "gaslighting" in a spectrum sense, recognizing that at the extreme end there are those who are full-blown diagnose-able and yet there are still MANY, MANY people in our culture who exhibit narcissism and practice gaslighting but do it in a less extreme way that wouldn't meet all the criteria for diagnosis. These less extreme forms still need to be seen, recognized, and identified because they can be very harmful and destructive in people's everyday lives. Gaslighting for instance in small doses (even if it doesn't last for years and doesn't lead someone to actual insanity) is still VERY harmful and manipulative. It is also essential to societal health to recognize how much of an epidemic is going on with these things as well. If we are silent about the narcissism and gaslighting epidemic in our society then they will silently destroy us.
My final point: Just because terms are misused doesn't mean we shouldn't use them. In fact, I would say it often requires us to use them more frequently and in a proper sense in order to reestablish their sense of meaning.
P.S. Really watch that video by Sam Vaknin I posted. He argues that narcissism is a form of PTSD and therefore depending on the level of trauma it will exhibit itself more or less extreme.